Every man has, at some point, wondered whether the size of his dick is good enough. And every woman has probably been asked at least once: Does size really matter?
Some guys obsess over length, others worry about girth, and some poor souls are still convinced that the golden ratio of penis proportions will unlock the secret to mind-blowing sex. But is there actually a perfect penis size?
Let’s talk a little more about size, shape, technique, and what really matters when you’re in the bedroom.
Do Women Have a Preference?
Studies on this are pretty inconsistent. Some claim women prefer slightly above average, others say girth is more important, and a surprising number argue that size doesn’t actually matter as long as you know what you’re doing.
A 2023 study asked 75 women to pick their ideal penis size, and here’s what they chose:
- For a long-term partner: 6.3 inches (16 cm) in length, 4.8 inches (12.2 cm) in girth.
- For a one-night stand: 6.4 inches (16.3 cm) in length, 5.0 inches (12.7 cm) in girth.
So, slightly bigger for hookups, but not by much—and it proves one thing: women aren’t out here hunting for 9-inch monsters (except maybe in their fantasies).
What’s “Normal” and What’s “Ideal”?
Before we get into what actually feels good for partners, let’s look at the cold, hard facts (pun fully intended).
According to a major study published in the British Journal of Urology International, here’s what they found about the average size:
- Flaccid length: 3.61 inches (9.16 cm)
- Erect length: 5.16 inches (13.12 cm)
- Girth (circumference) when erect: 4.59 inches (11.66 cm)
So if you’re hovering around the 5-to-6-inch mark when fully hard, congratulations—you’re completely normal. If you’re above that? You’re already in the so-called “big league” (even though most guys still refuse to believe it).
But Does Bigger Mean Better?
Not necessarily.
1. Girth Matters More Than Length
Many women say thickness provides better stimulation than sheer length. A wider penis creates more friction, provides a fuller sensation, and hits all the right spots without risking a cervix bruise (yes, that’s a thing).
2. Too Big Can Be a Problem
A lot of guys assume that bigger automatically means better, but oversized equipment comes with its own set of issues:
- Pain during sex—anything over 7-8 inches can be uncomfortable.
- Limited positions—deep penetration is tricky when there’s too much length.
- Takes longer to warm up—women need more time to adjust, and some positions might be off-limits entirely.
We reached out to Blue Monday, a provider of high-class London escorts, and spoke with Natasha, who’s seen her fair share of penis sizes. Here’s what she had to say:
“I had a client who was convinced he needed a monster cock to impress women, but the biggest guys aren’t always the best lovers. A thick, solid 6 inches with good technique beats an 8-inch guy who just rams it in every time.”
So What’s the Real Secret to Great Sex?
At the end of the day, the perfect penis size is the one you know how to use. Here’s what actually matters in the bedroom:
- Confidence – If you’re worried about your size, it shows. Own what you’ve got and focus on pleasure, not performance anxiety.
- Technique – If you don’t know how to move, no amount of inches will save you. Learn how to tease, grind, and adjust your rhythm.
- Foreplay – Spoiler alert: most women don’t orgasm from penetration alone. Get good with your hands, your mouth, and your timing.
- Communication – Every woman is different. What worked on your ex might not work on your next. Pay attention to what she wants.
Is There a “Perfect” Penis Size?
Short answer? No.
Long answer? The perfect size is whatever works best for both of you.
Research suggests that the 6-6.5 inch range with decent girth is the “sweet spot”, but at the end of the day, no two women (or men) are the same.
So, instead of measuring yourself against some imaginary porn standard, focus on being the best lay you can be—because great sex has nothing to do with inches and everything to do with how well you use them.